1

A trend story about millennials, by The New York Times

“When it comes down to it, life is really all about finding a hashtag for yourself and sending hilarious emoji on Venmo,” Packard said, and then, after a moment of reflection, added: “Lena Dunham.” […] “You’ve gotta ask yourself: Would you downvote the Yik Yak of your own life?” Delaney mused. His mood quickly soured. “Broad City is on,” he explained, removing a selfie stick from his man-purse. This devotion…

1

Stupid Puns For the Win

My daughter just trounced me in a pun war. In high school, I often tried masking my social awkwardness by making puns. Not just random puns, but stupid chains of rapid-fire puns, all on the same general subject. I had these mental lists of puns related to bland subjects like photography (“Lens be serious.” “That joke really shutter up.”) or shoes (“It’s the lace I can do.”)   Whenever one…

Breaking: Student consults syllabus before asking question about course schedule

NASHVILLE, TN – Vanderbilt University is currently under lock down after a student reportedly consulted his syllabus before asking a question about the course schedule. At least one Associate Professor is in serious condition after going into shock, and several other professor have suffered mild fainting episodes. Police have been able to confirm that Jose Gomez, a junior at Vanderbilt, had raised his hand during the first meeting of History…