“It started as a routine downtown patrol. An officer cruised a sports bar, then went behind the bar to rinse off his hands and looked up as a fight broke out in the crowd. As it grew, tavern employees intervened, trying to muscle the combatants outta the bar. The officer helped, and even in the cooling outside air, the antagonists continued to go at it. Arcata Police asked for help and before long were hosting their own fairly formidable badge ‘n’ acronym party, guests being HSUPD, HCSO and the CHP. ‘Have HSUPD head this way with a taser,’ reads the narrative. Confronted by a phalanx of glinting badges, the watering-hole warriors slammed their car doors in wussy surrogate defiance and drove off.”
—Arcata Eye Police Log (Arcata Eye)
A stunningly beautiful police activity report from a small town newspaper. Weeks and weeks of backlogs, with some reports written up as limericks. Thanks for suggesting yet another another alternative to productive work, Matt.