Paul Bunyan and the Spambot

An amusing bit of neo-folklore.

Well, Paul Bunyan was always a sucker for a bet, and anyhow lumber
futures were down, all the rivers he knew of had been tamed, there was
no room for new Great Lakes, and frankly, life had been boring of late.
So with a gigantic laugh that was heard as far away as San Francisco,
Caracas, and Berlin, he took Sam up on that bet.

Naturally, just getting Paul Bunyan online was already no mean
feat. There was no broadband available in the remote areas of the woods
where they’d been working, so the first thing he had to do was string
optical cable from the nearest T1 line, which was clear down in St.
Paul. For anybody but Paul Bunyan, that would have been near
impossible, but ol’ Paul just ordered a couple flatbeds of the finest
glass windows Minnesota had to offer, chewed’em all up in a single
mouthful, and drew’em out between his teeth to spin three hundred miles
of perfect fiber optics. Then he just coiled it all up in a loop, and
walked all the way into town, stringing that cable all the way. So
getting online wasn’t a real problem.