PR Pop Quiz: Intro to Crisis Management

Pop quiz for public relations 101.

Scenario 1: You run a wildly popular app that incorporates video with a live host. You learn that a reporter is writing a personality profile of your host. Do you

offer some cheerful quotes and then make a note to get your host to sign a new contract that handles such things as media requests (and maybe giving him a raise because he’s obviously a keeper)?
freak out, and turn the whole incident into a story about your cluelessly tone-deaf overreaction?

Scenario 2: You are an international beer company. In a satirical ad you mention silly name for a Medieval craft beer. You learn that a regional brewpub is planning to release a craft beer that uses that silly name. Do you

ask your legal team to dust off the standard cease-and-desist boilerplate, thus fulfilling your legal obligation to defend your copyright?
hire a town crier, have him crash the brewpub’s big event by reading an Old English cease-and-desist proclamation from a scroll, offer Superbowl tickets as an olive branch, and turn the whole incident into a story about your incredibly PR-savvy response?