Dr. Seuss Goes to Florida

[forwarded to me 28 Nov 2000, without an author]

Can we count them with our nose?
Can we count them with our toes?
Should we count them with a band?
Should we count them all by hand?
If I do not like the count, I will simply throw them out!
I will not let this vote count stand.
I do not like them, GORE I am!
Can we change these numbers here?
Can we change them, calm my fears?
What do you mean, George Dubya won?
This is not fair this is not fun.
Lets count them upside down this time.
Let's count until the state Is mine
I will not let this VOTE count stand! I do not like it, GORE I am!
I'm really ticked, I'm in a snit!
You have not heard the last of it!
I'll count the ballots one by one
And hold each one up to the sun
I'll count, recount, and count some more!
You'll grow to hate this little chore
But I will not, cannot let this vote count stand
I do not like it, GORE I am!
I won't leave office, I'm stayin' here,
I've glued my desk chair to my rear!
Tipper, Hillary and Bubba too,
are telling me that I should sue!
We find the Electoral College vile!
RECOUNT the votes until I smile!
We do not want this vote to stand!
We do not like it, GORE I am!
How shall we count this ballot box?
Let's count it standing in our socks!
Shall we count this one in a tree?
And who shall count it, you or me?
We cannot, cannot count enough!
We must not stop, we must be tough!
I do not want this vote to stand!
I do not like it, GORE I am!
I've counted till my fingers bleed
And still can't fulfill my counting need.
I'll count the tiles on the floor
I'll count, and count, and count some more.
And I will not say that I am done
Until the counting says I've won!
I will not let this vote count stand!
I do not like it, GORE I am!
What's that? What are you trying to say?
You think the current count should stay?
You do not like my counting scheme?
It makes you tense, gives you bad dreams?
Foolish people, you're wrong you'll see!
Your only care should be for me!

28 Nov. 2000 -- first posted here

See Also: 

Florida Election 2000 Humor

08 Nov 2000; by Dennis G. Jerz
Florida Electoral Votes in 2000- Why Usability Testing Matters
The 2000 U.S. Presidential race was so close that some Democratic Party officials think a hard-to-use Florida ballot may have unfairly decided the presidency.