amp-web-push-widget button.amp-subscribe { display: inline-flex; align-items: center; border-radius: 5px; border: 0; box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0; padding: 10px 15px; cursor: pointer; outline: none; font-size: 15px; font-weight: 500; background: #4A90E2; margin-top: 7px; color: white; box-shadow: 0 1px 1px 0 rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.5); -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); } /** * Jetpack related posts */ /** * The Gutenberg block */ .jp-related-posts-i2 { margin-top: 1.5rem; } .jp-related-posts-i2__list { --hgap: 1rem; display: flex; flex-wrap: wrap; column-gap: var(--hgap); row-gap: 2rem; margin: 0; padding: 0; list-style-type: none; } .jp-related-posts-i2__post { display: flex; flex-direction: column; /* Default: 2 items by row */ flex-basis: calc( ( 100% - var(--hgap) ) / 2 ); } /* Quantity qeuries: see https://alistapart.com/article/quantity-queries-for-css/ */ .jp-related-posts-i2__post:nth-last-child(n+3):first-child, .jp-related-posts-i2__post:nth-last-child(n+3):first-child ~ * { /* From 3 total items on, 3 items by row */ flex-basis: calc( ( 100% - var(--hgap) * 2 ) / 3 ); } .jp-related-posts-i2__post:nth-last-child(4):first-child, .jp-related-posts-i2__post:nth-last-child(4):first-child ~ * { /* Exception for 4 total items: 2 items by row */ flex-basis: calc( ( 100% - var(--hgap) ) / 2 ); } .jp-related-posts-i2__post-link { display: flex; flex-direction: column; row-gap: 0.5rem; width: 100%; margin-bottom: 1rem; line-height: 1.2; } .jp-related-posts-i2__post-link:focus-visible { outline-offset: 2px; } .jp-related-posts-i2__post-img { order: -1; max-width: 100%; } .jp-related-posts-i2__post-defs { margin: 0; list-style-type: unset; } /* Hide, except from screen readers */ .jp-related-posts-i2__post-defs dt { position: absolute; width: 1px; height: 1px; overflow: hidden; clip: rect(1px, 1px, 1px, 1px); white-space: nowrap; } .jp-related-posts-i2__post-defs dd { margin: 0; } /* List view */ .jp-relatedposts-i2[data-layout="list"] .jp-related-posts-i2__list { display: block; } .jp-relatedposts-i2[data-layout="list"] .jp-related-posts-i2__post { margin-bottom: 2rem; } /* Breakpoints */ @media only screen and (max-width: 640px) { .jp-related-posts-i2__list { display: block; } .jp-related-posts-i2__post { margin-bottom: 2rem; } } /* Container */ #jp-relatedposts { display: none; padding-top: 1em; margin: 1em 0; position: relative; clear: both; } .jp-relatedposts::after { content: ''; display: block; clear: both; } /* Headline above related posts section, labeled "Related" */ #jp-relatedposts h3.jp-relatedposts-headline { margin: 0 0 1em 0; display: inline-block; float: left; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: 700; font-family: inherit; } #jp-relatedposts h3.jp-relatedposts-headline em::before { content: ""; display: block; width: 100%; min-width: 30px; border-top: 1px solid rgba(0,0,0,.2); margin-bottom: 1em; } #jp-relatedposts h3.jp-relatedposts-headline em { font-style: normal; font-weight: 700; } /* Related posts items (wrapping items) */ #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items { clear: left; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual { margin-right: -20px; } /* Related posts item */ #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post { float: left; width: 33%; margin: 0 0 1em; /* Needs to be same as the main outer wrapper for Related Posts */ box-sizing: border-box; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post { padding-right: 20px; filter: alpha(opacity=80); -moz-opacity: .8; opacity: .8; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post:nth-child(3n+4), #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post:nth-child(3n+4) { clear: both; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post:hover .jp-relatedposts-post-title a { text-decoration: underline; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post:hover { filter: alpha(opacity=100); -moz-opacity: 1; opacity: 1; } /* Related posts item content */ #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual h4.jp-relatedposts-post-title, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items p, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items time { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; margin: 0; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post-nothumbs { position:relative; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post-nothumbs a.jp-relatedposts-post-aoverlay { position:absolute; top:0; bottom:0; left:0; right:0; display:block; border-bottom: 0; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items p, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items time { margin-bottom: 0; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual h4.jp-relatedposts-post-title { text-transform: none; margin: 0; font-family: inherit; display: block; max-width: 100%; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post .jp-relatedposts-post-title a { font-size: inherit; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; filter: alpha(opacity=100); -moz-opacity: 1; opacity: 1; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post .jp-relatedposts-post-title a:hover { text-decoration: underline; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post img.jp-relatedposts-post-img, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post span { display: block; max-width: 90%; overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post img.jp-relatedposts-post-img, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post span { height: auto; max-width: 100%; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post .jp-relatedposts-post-date, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post .jp-relatedposts-post-context { opacity: .6; } /* Hide the date by default, but leave the element there if a theme wants to use css to make it visible. */ .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post .jp-relatedposts-post-date { display: none; } /* Behavior when there are thumbnails in visual mode */ #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual div.jp-relatedposts-post-thumbs p.jp-relatedposts-post-excerpt { display: none; } /* Behavior when there are no thumbnails in visual mode */ #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post-nothumbs p.jp-relatedposts-post-excerpt { overflow: hidden; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual .jp-relatedposts-post-nothumbs span { margin-bottom: 1em; } /* List Layout */ #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-list .jp-relatedposts-post { clear: both; width: 100%; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-list .jp-relatedposts-post img.jp-relatedposts-post-img { float: left; overflow: hidden; max-width: 33%; margin-right: 3%; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-list h4.jp-relatedposts-post-title { display: inline-block; max-width: 63%; } /* * Responsive */ @media only screen and (max-width: 640px) { #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post { width: 50%; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post:nth-child(3n) { clear: left; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items-visual { margin-right: 20px; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 320px) { #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-items .jp-relatedposts-post { width: 100%; clear: both; margin: 0 0 1em; } #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-list .jp-relatedposts-post img.jp-relatedposts-post-img, #jp-relatedposts .jp-relatedposts-list h4.jp-relatedposts-post-title { float: none; max-width: 100%; margin-right: 0; } } /* * Hide the related post section in the print view of a post */ @media print { .jp-relatedposts { display:none ; } } .amp-logo amp-img{width:371px} .amp-menu input{display:none;}.amp-menu li.menu-item-has-children ul{display:none;}.amp-menu li{position:relative;display:block;}.amp-menu > li a{display:block;} /* Inline styles */ span.acss53c2f{background-color:initial;font-size:16.625px;}em.acss53c2f{background-color:initial;font-size:16.625px;}div.acss138d7{clear:both;}div.acss0dcba{--relposth-columns:3;--relposth-columns_m:3;--relposth-columns_t:3;}div.acss9c63b{aspect-ratio:16/9;background:transparent url(https://i0.wp.com/jerz.setonhill.edu/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/Screenshot-2025-05-19-at-2.58.09%E2%80%AFPM.png?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%;height:150px;max-width:150px;}div.acss020fa{color:#333333;font-family:Arial Narrow;font-size:11px;height:45px;}div.acss3a357{aspect-ratio:16/9;background:transparent url(https://i0.wp.com/jerz.setonhill.edu/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/Screenshot-2025-05-16-at-5.16.26%E2%80%AFPM.png?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%;height:150px;max-width:150px;}div.acss7eda5{aspect-ratio:16/9;background:transparent url(https://i0.wp.com/jerz.setonhill.edu/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/6824ff171400002400a3fa3e.jpeg?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%;height:150px;max-width:150px;}div.acss8f56f{aspect-ratio:16/9;background:transparent url(https://i0.wp.com/jerz.setonhill.edu/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/msn-ai-brandon-hunter-useless2.jpg?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%;height:150px;max-width:150px;}div.acss00c00{aspect-ratio:16/9;background:transparent url(https://i0.wp.com/jerz.setonhill.edu/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/011625-big-boys-L1110063-scaled.jpg?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%;height:150px;max-width:150px;}div.acssff828{aspect-ratio:16/9;background:transparent url(https://i0.wp.com/jerz.setonhill.edu/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/fact-check-leo-xiv-e1747405844692.jpg?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1) no-repeat scroll 0% 0%;height:150px;max-width:150px;} .icon-widgets:before {content: "\e1bd";}.icon-search:before {content: "\e8b6";}.icon-shopping-cart:after {content: "\e8cc";}

I Cannot Begin to Tell You How Proficient I Am in Microsoft Word

Is this satire? It doesn’t matter. It gave me feels. For me, though, it was Word Perfect and Broderbund Print Shop that were there for me as a teenager finding my voice.

Bold and italics are the oils that grace my palette. Cut and paste the strings upon my lyre. Fonts, bullets, columns, indentations—these stubborn materials are no match for the alchemy with which I extract meaning and impose order. For I am proficient in Microsoft Word.

Many are the candidates who come touting their areas of expertise—beginner Spanish, ability to work well under pressure—but none compare to the fluency with which I insert links and align text, add comments and reply to the comments left by others. Eli Burnstein The New Yorker (painfully evocative photo by Ryan J. Lane)

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Dennis G. Jerz

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