Jerz > Writing > Academic
[ Argument | Title | Thesis | Blueprint | Pro/Con | Quoting | MLA Format ]
| The biography Black Elk Speaks challenges the Western genre’s stereotype of the “savage Indian” through its attention to cultural detail, its use of Indian words, and its direct quotes from Black Elk. |
There is nothing magically “correct” about a thesis on challenging a cultural stereotype. Instead of claiming that a book “challenges a genre’s stereotypes,” you might instead argue that some text “provides a more expensive but more ethical solution than X” or “undermines Jim Smith’s observation that ‘[some quote from Smith here]’”. (Don’t automatically use “challenges a genre’s stereotype” in the hopes of coming up with the “correct” thesis.)
A more complicated thesis statement for a paper that asks you to demonstrate your ability engage with someone else’s ideas (rather than simply summarize or react to someone else’s ideas) might follow a formula like this:
| Although Smith says “quote a passage that makes a specific claim you intend to disagree with” (123), in this paper I will use Brown’s concept of X to argue that [your original thesis goes here].” | |
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For a short paper (1-2 pages), the thesis statement is often the first sentence. A complex thesis statement for a long paper may be part of a thesis paragraph. But it’s hard to go wrong if you put your thesis first.
If you’re not sure whether you have a good thesis statement, see whether you can fit your ideas into one of these basic patterns.
| [Something] [does something] because [reason(s)]. or Because [reason(s)], [something] [does something]. | |
| Although [opposing evidence], [reasons] show [something] [does something]. |
If you are just starting out, and you are still developing an original, evidence-based claim to defend, a simpler formula is probably best. Once you have done the research, and you understand the subject, then a formula like the following won’t look like random words; it will suggest a way to frame a nuanced, complex argument that goes beyond making non-controversial factual statements.
| While [a specific, named person] says [a direct quote or paraphrase from the source], [a different, named person] says [something else]. While the two authors disagree over [a minor point], they both share a deep concern over [the topic of your paper]. [Person one’s] refusal to accept [a particular point made by person two]suggests that [person one] is [your thesis — stating the real reason why person one won’t agree with person two]. | |
| What really matters is not guessing the magically correct words to fit some secret formula that your mean instructor is refusing to tell you. What matters is that you have researched your subject, that you have found and engaged meaningfully with peer-reviewed academic sources, and that you are developing an evidence-based claim, rather than summarizing or giving unsupported opinion. | |
Parts of a Thesis Statement
The thesis statement has 3 main parts: the limited subject, the precise opinion, and the blueprint of reasons.
Make sure you’ve chosen a subject that meets your instructor’s requirements for the assignment. (It never hurts to ask.)
The precise opinion gives your answer to a question about the subject. A good precise opinion is vital to the reader’s comprehension of the goal of the essay.
A blueprint is a plan. It lets the builder know that the foyer will be here, the living room will be to the east, the dining room to the west, and the family room will be north.The blueprint of an essay permits you to see the whole shape of your ideas before you start churning out whole paragraphs.While it’s okay for you to start writing down your ideas before you have a clear sense of your blueprint, your reader should never encounter a list of details without being told exactly what point these details are supposed to support. (For more details on the reasoning blueprint, see Blueprinting.)
| The biography Black Elk Speaks challenges the Western genre’s stereotype of the “savage Indian” through its attention to cultural detail, its use of Indian words, and its direct quotes from Black Elk. | |
In the blueprint, the author signals an intention to support the precise opinion. The author of the example above introduces three different kinds of evidence:
Informed by this blueprint, the reader expects to encounter one section (a paragraph or more) devoted to each subtopic.The blueprint determines the shape of your paper. | |
If your thesis statement introduces three reasons A, B and C, the reader will expect a section on reason A, a section on reason B, and a section on reason C.
For a single paragraph, you might only spend one sentence on each reason. For a 2-3 page paper, each reason might get its own paragraph. For a 10-page paper, each reason might contain its own local thesis statement, with its own list of reasons, so that each section involves several paragraphs.To emphasize the structure of your essay, repeat keywords or paraphrased ideas from the blueprint as you introduce the sections in which you expand on each point. Crafting good transitions is a skill that takes time and practice. (See Transitions and Reminders of Thesis).
Note: If you repeat your blueprint phrases and your thesis statement robotically (“The third point I want to talk about is how Black Elk Speaks accurately represents the Indian lifestyle through its direct quotes from Black Elk.”), your writing will be rather dry and lifeless. Dull writing is probably better than aimless rambling, although neither is terribly effective. |
Note: A thesis statement amounts to nothing if the paper is not completely focused on that main point. Blueprinting helps create the coherency of the thesis throughout the entire essay, which makes it a necessary part of the thesis statement.
| Black Elk Speaks accurately represents Indian lifestyle through its attention to cultural detail, its use of Indian words, and its direct quotes from Black Elk. | |
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| Is Black Elk Speaks a tragedy? | |
| This is a question, not a statement. It’s fine to sit down at the keyboard with the intention of writing a paper to answer this question, but before you start churning out the sentences, you should have a clear idea of what answer you’re trying to support. | |
| This paper will look at the book’s attention to cultural detail, its use of Indian words, and its direct quotations from Black Elk, in order to determine whether Black Elk Speaks accurately represents Indian lifestyle. | |
| The above sample is slightly better because it offers more detail, but it still doesn’t say what position the author is taking on the topic of whether the book is accurate. | |
| Because the events in the story emphasize Black Elk’s role as a Sioux Warrior, and do not describe his eventual conversion to Catholicism and membership in the Society of St. Joseph, Black Elk Speaks presents a skewed and simplified view of the complex history of Native Americans. | |
| Note that the above sample contains a topic (the accuracy of Black Elk Speaks), opinion (it is skewed and simplified), and reasoning (because the book only tells part of the story). You don’t need to present those three parts in that exact order every time; furthermore, your instructor may have a good reason to ask you for a different organization. But most of the time, including these three parts will help your reader to follow your ideas much more closely. | |
| Biographies of all types can teach us many things about the past. What was the culture like? What was the language like? And what did the people say? One such book is Black Elk Speaks, which tells the story of a Sioux warrior in the late 1800s. How accurate is this book? This paper will investigate the cultural details, the language, and what Black Elk actually said, in order to determine the answer. | |
| The above sample starts off with a wordy, general statement about biographies. But the main topic isn’t about biographies of all types, it’s specifically about one book, Black Elk Speaks. | |
17 Oct 2000 — originally posted by Nicci Jordan, UWEC Junior
08 Dec 2000 — first posted here. Maintained by Prof. Jerz.
13 Dec 2003 — links updated
22 Sep 2006 — moderate revisions by Jerz
29 Oct 2011 — updated by Jerz
14 June 2015 — minor adjustments
Blueprinting: Planning Your Essay
A blueprint is a rough but specific plan, or outline, which defines the structure of your whole essay. The blueprint, usually located within the thesis statement, is a brief list of the points you plan to make, compressed into just a few words each, in the same order in which they appear in the body of your paper.
A thesis reminder is a direct echo of the thesis statement. In a short paper, the topic sentence of each paragraph should repeat words or phrases from the thesis statement.
Tips for writing timed essays: Plan your time wisely. Answer the right question. Collect your thoughts. Leave time to revise. Revise your thesis statement
View Comments
I feel that Online courses are better than traditional classes due to you get to make your own schedule. this is my thesis any suggestions?
Drop the "I feel." Your feelings aren't a matter open for intellectual debate -- either you feel that way or you don't.
Are there other reasons besides just the schedule? What about an opposing view? "Although online classes have drawbacks A and B, students who have qualities P and Q will be able to keep A and B in check, and are thus ready to benefit from the X, Y, and Z that make online classes a better choice."
The word "better" is vague. So what if the class is more convenient if it's so easy to cheat that students don't actually learn, or it's so easy to fall behind (because you set your own schedule that involves planning to do 15 weeks of work in the last 5 days of the semester), or you live in a part of the world that doesn't have access to technology, etc. etc.
im currently doing an online classes and i have trouble with writting an essay: the introducton part and the thesies statement and body paragraph
is it necesssary we writ a thesis statement before writing an essay?
I would suggest you spend 15 minutes pouring out your thoughts on whatever your topic is, then circle or highlight your best ideas, and use them to come up with a preliminary thesis. You should have a good idea what your thesis is before you start writing out your final draft-- but a lot of writing and rewriting happens before your final draft.
For my thesis on homelessness, would this be okay: Homelessness is a growing problem around the world with the major cause being poverty. In order to prevent homelessness there needs to be more options suitable for low income families.
Does that make sense?
For my thesis on homelessness, would this be okay: Homelessness is a growing problem around the world with the major cause being poverty. In order to prevent homelessness there needs to be more options suitable for low income families.
If I have to write a thesis on Homelessness, how do i get started?
That depends on what kind of paper you're being asked to write... is a personal essay, or a research paper?
http://jerz.setonhill.edu/writing/creative1/personal-essays/
http://jerz.setonhill.edu/writing/academic1/short-research-papers/
I love this site and it is very useful. Mr. Jerz, can you read the following paragraphs and comment on my thesis statement?
Concise Review of Literature:
The general usages of טוב in the Old Testament have been studied in two ways: first, by analogy with the use of its cognate in the ancient treaty/covenant documents in Aramaic and Akkadian, and, second, by a study of its usages within the Scripture itself. The former has identified טוב as “friendship” made by treaty and even as a synonym of “covenant.” And the latter provides many different definitions based on its in various contexts: (a) an expression of suitability for a purpose; (b) an indication of quality; (c) a positive characterization of people; (d) a positive evaluation of decisions in wisdom literature; and (e) good in contrast to wicked, etc.
A Research Question:
Given the above information, the research question for this study is: Does טוב in Books I-III have the same connotations as both in the ancient Near Eastern and in the general analysis of the term in the theological dictionaries without any difference? If not, how different connotation and function does it have and play in Books I-III? If this study shows that טוב is used in a different dimension, the horizon of our understanding of Books I-III will be further expanded.
Thesis Statement:
This study will argue that the term טוב in Books I-III is to be understood in light of not only covenant but also wisdom. To demonstrate this thesis, this dissertation will analyze all word pairs/collocations—paradigmatic or syntagmatic—and various kinds of parallelisms in its semantic fields, and all possible intertextual associations pertinent to the term טוב and their interactions within Books I-III.
Debatable points:
1. Has טוב in Books I-III to do with the concept of covenant as in the above literature review?
2. Is טוב in Books I-III also concerned with wisdom and does it play any canonical function within the books?
That phrase "is to be understood" sounds like a commandment from on high, rather than a position supported by evidence. "Option X is preferable to option Y, because X avoids problems A, B, and C (which are linked to Y), and also leads to extra benefits P and Q (which are impossible with Y)."
That exact pattern may not work for you, and there is no need to jam it all into one sentence, but the idea is to emphasize your reasoning, so the reader voluntarily accepts your point of view.
Hi dennis i wrote a different approach to my thesis and I am awaiting your reply..
Who, specifically, is making the mistake of taking child abuse lightly, or mistakenly acting as if child abuse is only physical abuse? Whose actions or statements need to be corrected? The more specific you can be, the better.
I might come up with very good reasons to explain why people should not put live eels into their ice cream, but unless I have evidence that an influential person is telling people to put live eels into their ice cream, or large numbers of people have shown up in emergency rooms covered in chocolate sauce and suffering from eel bites, there is no particular need to write a whole paper to convince people not to do that.
Of course, this all depends on the purpose of your assignment... if your instructor is OK with you writing a paper that explains the impact of child abuse, or that explores the different segments of society that are responsible, then that may be all you need. In that case, you might want to look at the tips on this page: http://jerz.setonhill.edu/writing/technical-writing/process-description-how-to-write-about-a-sequence-of-events/
This web page is devoted specifically to the instructions I give to college students who are doing academic research papers -- and that means referring to recent scholarly / scientific studies that present original research on current topics. So, based on the way I would grade such a paper, I'd say your thesis would be stronger if it cited a specific case of the problem you want to avoid, or a particular scholarly study that counted, analyzed, or otherwise measured the frequency and impact of the problem.
Hi,I am looking for a thesis statement for Child abuse, actually a blueprint thesis especially. Can you give an example paper due tomorrow.
Simoy, take a look at this page:
http://jerz.setonhill.edu/writing/academic1/blueprinting-using-the-thesis-paragraph-to-plan-your-essay/
If you read through those examples and post a few different tries, I'll let you know how I think they compare.
How many more must die? The issue of child abuse is of utmost importance because children cannot speak for themselves. Child abuse is when a parent or guardian causes or allows a child to suffer neglect, physical, emotional and sexual harm.Child abuse creates a sense of hopelessness,a high crime rate and a breakdown in society. Who is to blame? Parents or the lack of protective laws and legislation.
You could turn "parents are more at fault than legislators" or the opposite into your main thesis, but you would have to do the research first and then decide, rather than make the decision now based on your gut feeling and then expect to be able to "find quotes" to support an opinion you pulled from the air.
Thanks Dennis, but what about this approach. Child abuse does not only constitute physical abuse, but neglect, emotional and/or sexual abuse as well. The issue of child abuse should be not be taken lightly because children cannot speak for themselves.High crime rate and the breakdown in society are some of the factors that stem from child abuse. Parents and legislators are both at fault for this problem that continues unabated.
Try "neglect, physical, emotional and/or sexual..."
You can't actually provide a number to answer your opening question... I would tell my own students to stick mostly with facts, as it's a bigger intellectual accomplishment to defend a debatable point with statistics than it is to get someone else to share your moral outrage. No rational person would ever argue "child abuse is good," because by definition "abuse" is bad, so a paper that develops from this thesis will likely be one-sided. A more debatable claim might be "parents whose preschool daughters compete in beauty pageants should be prosecuted as child abusers" or "the public school system is so effective (or ineffective) that parents who don't use it (or do use it) should be considered child abusers."
I don't say that I personally believe any of those statements, or that it would be possible to prove any of them, I am just demonstrating how to make your thesis more debatable.
i need help quickly.! how do i do a thesisstatement about the colorado rivers present, past, and future.?
its due tmrw.!!!!!!!!!!!