how problem X is one of the biggest threats to society 

today.  It affects us in our homes, at school, on the 

street, and everywhere we go.  In a study written by Joe

Smith, it says: (4) 

In the ten largest cities of North America, 

incidents of Problem X have been reported at

an alarming rate in the past ten years.(5)  A 

study published in The New England Journal of

Medicine reported (6) a 14% rise in incidents 

involving college students during that period, 

as well as an even more alarming 20% spike

among women who own cats. (7) (Smith 43)(8)

(4) You should be supporting your thesis here  What you have done instead done is extended your introduction by quoting a lengthy passage from somebody else's introduction.

(5) When did Smith write? 1880?  This time reference does not help your paper.

(6) If this article is important, you should look it up and read it yourself.  Smith 
has done your research for you, so it won't help your grade much.

(7) Extremely wordy.  Simplify, and get on with your own argument.

In 1990, Jones and Peterson reported that incidents among college students rose 14%, and among women who own cats, an alarming 20% (qtd. in Smith 43).

(8) But what did Smith assert or conclude after conducting  this scrutiny? You quote only the driest, most basic part.  Why did Smith bother to bring up this study in the first place?