“Raaaah! Gronk hate H.R. 3712, the Income And Property Tax Reassessment Act! Senator Gronk crush middle-class tax hike!” Sen. Gronk –Me Crush Middle-Class Tax Hike!The Onion)
“MIT professors claim the gear would let grunts leap 20-foot walls, become nearly invisible on command, deflect bullets, heal their wounds quickly, protect against chemical and biological agents — and strike fear into the hearts of evildoers everywhere. ” Noah Shachtman –America’s Might: A Comic TaleWired) The researchers reportedly used a comic book hero as an illustration in their $50 million grant proposal.
“My idea is to pollute the source in order to discourage students from eagerly grabbing papers off the Internet and assuming they will get the grade that the term-paper service almost guarantees. ” Vincent Moore –Playing Dirty in the War on PlagiarismChronicle)
“A computer chat program that speaks Hindi could open up computers to India’s illiterate millions. ” –Hindi Chatbot Breaks New GroundBBC)
“But after spending 20 minutes just designing the introduction page, the students still can’t answer the most basic question: What does the liver do? ‘I don’t know; we were supposed to do the gallbladder,’ answers a shy Latino girl with pigtails. They are learning how to use PowerPoint, but they have no idea what the content means.” Julie Landry — Wayback Archive: Is Our Children Learning? (Red Herring)
“The next word in security is a system so thorough that it will reveal even the contents of a cigarette pack hidden in your coat pocket. Developed by Pacific Northwest National Laboratory, the scanner uses holographic imaging technology to provide full-body, 360-degree coverage of a person in near real time. ” –There’s No Place to HideWired)
“Navigating through digital texts was one of the e-book users’ biggest complaints. They found moving from page to page ‘tedious.’ They also found it difficult to find specific chapters in texts and to find particular words.” –Students Complain About Devices for Reading E-Books, Study FindsChronicle)
“Citing creative differences, SatireWire’s founder and sole employee, Andrew Marlatt, announced that as of today, the site will no longer be updated. Unlike everything else on the site, this is not a joke.” Andrew Marlatt –SatireWire Has LandedSatireWire) SatireWire was never quite as good as The Onion, but it did have a pleasant “doing this in my spare time from my garage” kind of feel.
“But what of the world’s water crisis? Currently the UN identifies approximately six ‘hot stains,’ places where water is so scarce that human life may not be sustainable and conflict over dwindling resources is an ever present threat. ” Ginger Adams Otis –A World Without WaterVillage Voice)
“Why does the developed world worry so much about sustainability? Because we constantly hear a litany of how the environment is in poor shape. Natural resources are running out. Population is growing, leaving less and less to eat. Species are becoming extinct in vast numbers. ….There is, however, one problem: this litany is not supported by the evidence.” Bjorn Lomborg –The Environmentalists are WrongNYT — registration req’d)