See, it’s funny, because poets need to suffer for their art, and people who get well-paying jobs are too isolated from their own existences to be able to write meaningfully about longing and desire and grit, right? (It’s satire, folks.)

Petroleum giant Exxon Mobil is one of many Fortune 500 companies that is using innovative ways to snag creative writing majors fresh out of graduation. In March, the company finished construction near its Texas headquarters of a 20,000-square-foot facility that can house up to 150 creative writing majors, each getting his or her own cramped living space reminiscent of a bare-bones studio in New York or Paris. The facility also includes a non-corporate coffee shop, a used clothing store and two dive bars replete with a colorful cast of squatters and artists that will keep creative writing majors feeling like they are experiencing the grittiness of a Bohemian existence. —The Dandy Goat.